Hey Flunkee! Your Music Sucks

Dear Summer School Students -


It has come to my attention that you not only can't pass 7th grade algebra, but that you have shitty taste in music.
I

I have no problem with you listening to music so long as I can't hear it. If it helps you work better, fine. If you're ignoring your work because you're listening, that's cool too, just do it quietly.


I have no reason to be listening to your shit gangsta rap (because you're from the mean streets of Delaware) or Justin Bieber (makeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstop).


Thanks much. Keep on working/dicking around.

Summer School Silence

I was sort of expecting the first day of summer school to be a freaking nightmare, but shockingly it's going pretty well.

It started off sort of crappy.

My alarm went off at 6, which, ew. After hauling my ass out of bed by like 6:15 and getting dressed and all I moseyed my way down Kirkwood Highway to Stanton, where the fun fest is being held this year. Found myself hanging with the other teachers in the gym lobby, with them yelling at a few kids to take their hats off (they refused) and taunting them for seeing the same kids again from the school year.

Which is just cruel, really. If you didn't pass Spanish the first time with a teacher, you're stuck wtih them again? Bummer.

But once I got in the classrooms after straightening everything out tech wise(for some reason, I've been designated tech support. I know, right?) I discovered the kids were relatively well behaved. I mean yeah, there's the idiot in the corner that was with me last year for the same thing and isn't doing work, and then there's one to my right who's staring at the start up screen, but the kids around me are doing surprisingly well. Like, they want to get their shit done and go home.

Best Gossip Ever

I've always wondered what profession had the best gossip. Whether it was construction men talking about what they did last night, lawyers talking about how hungover they were, et cetera.

It's teachers.

They know everyone's business, all the student criminals, all the people who are dating in their schools and who doesn't work and who does. Which makes me think two things:
1) They're awesome for your sleaze factor.
2) I never want to be a teacher.

For example, they were talking about how a fellow teacher accidentally showed porn to their Spanish class. And how she didn't know that was in it, because she got it from the library. And how the kids were screaming like crazy. And how all the teachers were laughing/shocked/scarred when they showed it around.

And how it wasn't an accident.

Two Students = Time For Pandora

Here at Conrad Schools of Science High School Summer School, we don't allow students to listen to headphones. It's a distraction, and it's against the rules.

That said, since there are only two students in the second class today (Mark and Shatir, who taught us how to "swag" and how to rap yesterday when the server was down), we allowed it. Which means I can Pandora the second half away.

Niiiiiiiiiice.

Sometimes, Jesus Is Not the Answer

It sort of pains me to make this entry. But it needed to be done, and I'm sure that the Lord will understand.

I was grading some of the submissions today when one caught my eye. The student who will remain nameless (because I can't remember who it was) put down the following answers for unrelated questions:

"Jesus."

"HI JESUS."

"Jeesssssssuuuusssssss."

"Jeessssssssuuuusssssss brown bag of Jeesssuuuusss."

I hate to tell people, because I as a Catholic have been taught from a young age that Jesus will always be the answer. And yeah, he comes in handy in tough situations. But on standardized tests? Jesus is not always the answer. Sorry, God.

DSC, Please Hold

Today started my second foray into summer school administration/teaching, and I gotta say, it was rocky.

This year rather than being coordinator assistant in a middle school, I'm an Ed Options supervisor/teacher/person in a high school program. So that was my first clue to get out of the middle school meeting halfway through (although it was nice to see 3 of my previous teachers from middle and high school wondering why I was there. I accidentally insulted one, I think, by saying I was way too young to teach...).

Anyway, the whole program I'm working on is online. Which is cool. The bad news is, the server for the school (and the district at large) tends to crash the day before it's needed by everyone involved with the summer school. Especially us, whose whole program is on the Internet. And us, who need to get logged in before we can do/grade anything.

A bigger problem here is with DSC, or Data Service Center. In addition to being the people who take care of all the grades, report cards, and attendance records, they're also the people who need to log you into the system before you can get paid. Which...it says I'm logged into, but I don't remember ever getting a user name or password. I did last year, but I don't remember the password or how the hell my old supervisor misspelled my name (something like Alexandria Polumbo). So I can't get paid my $13 an hour.

I finally got it all worked out with my name spelled correctly and my password securely in place, but it still meant I had to listen to a video game version of "Let it Be" for 20 minutes. Oy.