Bear Left, Dogg.

So I saw this on SNL and EW.com, and thought it was hilarious. Apparently, Tom Tom GPS systems have gotten Snoop Dogg to be a celebrity navigator. He recorded his voice so that when you jump in your car and don't want to get lost, Snoop Doggy Dog will get you to the do'.

Victor/Victoria

So as some of you may know, Allie and Matt and I were in a chorus concert on Saturday afternoon for our All Campus Choral Ensemble performance. Allie was in the alto section, Matt was a bass, and I was in the tenor and alto sections. According to the teacher, I was mentioned in both sections of the program for singing in two different sections.

So I took a look, and as it turned out, I was listed as two different people. In the Alto section, I was listed as Alexandra Palombo (as I had asked, that's my name). In the tenor section, I was listed as Alex Palumbo - my last name was spelled wrong and it was cut down to Alex to make it look like it was a man singing in the men's section.

I figure that the last name was an honest mistake, - I mean, really, the same person is in the program twice, you would think someone would look above and make sure they were at least consistent if not right - but I don't know about the first name issue. Looking at the program, it felt as if the teacher was trying to deny that there was a woman singing tenor.

Tripping About

At right is a (very small) version of the London Tube (subway) map. It has 12 different lines, all connecting Zones 1-6 and perhaps beyond of London: Bakerloo, Central, Circle, District, East London, Hammersmith & City, Jubilee, Metropolitan, Northern, Picadilly, Victoria, and Waterloo & city.

My plan is this: To take as many tube rides as possible and get pictures of myself at/around all of the stops.



I want to really see as much of London (and the surrounding areas) as possible, and I've heard that other than the double decker buses (which I totally plan on using) and walking, that the Tube is the best way to get around. Very easy, very quick, very connected. So what better way to get a full city experience than to use the Underground with everyone else?

I want pictures of myself with the signs, sort of like this one that I took on the Paris Metro line (yes, in fact, Stalingrad is a stop on the PARIS metro, not on the Moscow Underground). Now granted, I wasn't in these photos, but I want a bunch to make a huge collage of all the places I've been. I want to really explore through London, and if that means taking pictures of myself with signs like the one at left, I'm totally okay with looking like a total tourist and doing so.

For Your Entertainment

So I was sitting through my journalism block today and I kept thinking: what did kids do for entertainment during class before portable laptops?

I mean really. When you're not paying attention to your teacher (much), you can be "researching." And by "researching," I mean looking up stuff on Stumble Upon, reading up on BBC or EW or the Guardian or whatever to supplement that awesome internship you got. Or sending e-mails. Or playing Sporcle.

I don't always bring my laptop with me to classes, because it's not always worth the trouble of lugging the thing and the power chord with me everywhere. And last year, Sarah and I made do just fine during our News I class by playing an epic championship of the Box Dot Game. But seriously. Before laptops, how did kids sit through their boring college classes? I want to know. I would also like to thank Mac for creating my lovely little piece of tech heaven.

IC Is On Its Period

But really, this campus needs to down a Hershey's, pop a Midol, and chill out.

Not going to go into detail about my own life, except to say that this semester has been really tough and I just got dumped over Instant Message by a guy I was dating. And I'm not going into detail about what's gong on in Meg's life, because it's not really my business to share and because I don't know the whole situation.

But we can both agree that this town is totally PMSing. This semester, people have gone absolutely crazy and disregarded civility, and I'm not talking about just some people. It's everyone on this campus, self included. We're all being rude, talking behind backs, and generally needing to leave this campus for a break (thank GOD for Thanksgiving). And it needs to stop.

I Sort Of Love Al Gore

He went green. He's a democrat. He's (somewhat) eloquent. He's been on SNL and 30 Rock. And he knows what a "Chyron" is. And we didn't elect him. Discuss.

Newsroom Drama. Video at 11.

We need to talk about all the nonsense going on in my News class. Because at this point, the class drama is more interesting than the news we're covering.

We would cover it, but it's a conflict of interest.

It was all brewing at the beginning of the semester when our professor that we were supposed to have went to another college. We got reassigned to the professor we have now, who is a great person but teaches in a style that doesn't really work for me. And it's a class full of really ambitious people that are willing to step on others' toes to get what they want (unfortunately). So when we stepped into the studio, I knew stuff would get ugly after a while.

And it did. It started with some pretty catty e-mails that got sent to the entire class, which started one of the most middle school fights I've ever seen (since the Facebook fight between two other people last year). One of the parties involved didn't come to class today, so she missed Drama #2.

This one started when we walked into class. The teacher passed us a handout, which Meg and I immediately thought was the e-mail battle that had somehow gotten back to her (judging by one girl's face, I thought we were all in for it). Turned out it was the teacher telling us we weren't doing a newscast on Friday, that we were having a test on Monday, an essay due then, and that our work had been for nothing.

Which, really, Meg and I hadn't done work yet on the package, but still, everyone else had.

Turned into a few people basically saying what the whole class was thinking to the teacher (that we were wasting time and that we really needed that studio time, and that we were really offended that we weren't learning more and all that). C had to step out, I asked S to go check on her, and I took a bathroom break to walk around and not be in that room because...drama.

I mean, I'm not going to rag on Park as much as Meg did (although I do agree with a lot of what she says). I know that there are teachers that know what they're doing and teach really well. I just haven't had all of them. But really, can we just do a newscast and save the drama for your mama? I want this semester to end with me sort of knowing what I'm doing in a control room and with an A plus or minus average. Not much to ask! Why so much of this shit?

It's Been A While...

...so it's been a bit since I posted on this blog. Mainly because I haven't had much to write about and I haven't really been in the mood to post. But sit tight, I swear I'll post soon!

Clinton Intervention

So in case you don't know, late night ginger Conan O'Brien and oddly famous Mayor Cory Booker (Newark, NJ) have been having a ridiculous fight because O'Brien made an awesome joke at Newark's expense. It has gotten SO bad that even our Secretary of State took notice.
I didn't like Hilary Clinton much before, but the girl does have a sense of humor.

RIP Wishbone

I don't know if this is true or not, but I heard from fairly reliable sources (Kristin) that the dog who played Wishbone on PBS has died. I know the original dog from the pilot died quite some time ago, but apparently they had like the same dog doing a lot of the episodes and he just died recently.

So in memoriam, I leave you with the theme song and the memories of this adorable Jack Russell Terrier.

Blog Pimping Time!

It's blog pimping time!

I haven't posted in a few days because I've had something of a life. I am now a partial poster on the larger Drugs & Donuts blog roster. There's also posts from GGM repeat offenders Allie, Anne, KellyPaul, Morgan, and Casey. And I think it's pretty funny, actually.

So go read it. You know, when you've read mine.

Reason #583929 To Like Sesame Street

Yeah, it's a kid's show. But is it really?

The Paper Has Two Faces

I was seriously about to hurt someone as of TV News P&E today. I contained myself. Let me explain.

I got my application for London in the week before it was due, with a few pieces coming in from other places (teachers and judicial affairs). I went to OIP and checked to make sure that everything was in order. They said it was, and I was convinced I was fine.

I got an e-mail this afternoon saying that I was missing my academic recommendation, my judicial affairs clearance, and my academic plan.

I pretty much flipped my shit and stormed up to Park to ask them if they still had it. They didn't, called over to OIP, and reassured me that everything was there.

So after three of the most boring hours of my life, I headed up to OIP and made them check my file. Everything was there.

Turns out they didn't realize things were printed front and back, and thought I was missing all the backs.

Kleptos Anonymous

My name is Alex, and I'm an accidental klepto.

Let me explain.

I was in the library today to kill an hour or so before swimming (there's this weird lag between Personal Essay and open swim). So I went to the library and hung out, catching up on Newsweek and Time, checking e-mails, surfing randomly to find something for Cake's Artist to Watch page. I was putting back my Time and Newsweek when the TV Guide caught my eye (because DILF Hugh Laurie was on the front).

I read it, stuck it in my bag, and went to swim. Not even really realizing that it belonged to the library.

Cut to 4 hours later when I'm in our apartment bathroom and I see an uncharacteristically generic-looking roll of toilet paper on the back of the throne. I ask Monica about it, and she's like, "Oh, I took it from campus center today. I don't want to use ours up." She somehow managed to jimmy the toilet paper holders open with a pen.

I want to say I'm shocked and outraged at her blatant theivery, but really, I'm proud. We pay $50 grand a year to come here. They can spare us some paper products or an accidental magazine.

We Put Out On Thursdays

It all started with a seniors tribute video last year at the banquet, and it has since turned into an office joke.

The question in the video was "What would you say if The Ithacan were a person?"

Special Projects Manager and former EIC Erica Hendry giggled and said "I hear you put out on Thursdays." Which...was pretty epic.

Now, a semester later, it's been turned into a t-shirt (which I'm totally getting). Only now we put out every day, because we're a daily online newspaper and weekly print version. Which goes out on Thursdays. Ah, suggestive journalism jokes.

Can I Tell You A Secret?

So on a whim the other day, I e-mailed Frank Warren of Post Secret-creation fame, because he was coming to Binghamton University on the 2nd. I was expecting to get some sort of automated response, or some flunkie e-mailing me back about how busy he was.

Instead, I get "Hi Alex, call tomorrow. - Frank"

To put it simply? My reaction.

So keep an eye out in the Ithacan this week for a real article (!!!!) by me, or keep an eye online for that one. I'm really excited, he was really cool and very interesting to talk to.

Swine Flu: We Had The Warning Signs!

So everyone and their brother (or my uncle, who actually has it) has been freaking out about the Swine Flu. To the point where kids here are about to make shirts that say "I Survived Swine '09." But people, we saw the signs and ignored them.

I mean, come on. We're on Season 6 of House now, and Amber died from flu-like symptoms way back in season 4.

Remember when she was on the bus sneezing and shit before she got thrown and all liver-damaged? Yeah. She had the flu. In New Jersey, at a college hospital where it can spread quick. You know what this means.

Cutthroat Bitch started Swine '09 way back in '08. Thanks, Amber. Sorry, Wilson.

Blog Numba FO

That's right. Four of them.

There's this one, which is just for fun. And all of my stupid ramblings and such about...well, nothing. News II Electric Boogaloo is for, well, News II. Pretty obvious, judging by the title. It has my Ithacan articles and my Dipity on it, and nothing else really of importance. Same with the Wordpress blog, because that was another News II experiment. The fourth?

Ithaca's Imprint Magazine. I'm psyched.

Disney Needs To Stop With The Remakes

So I was cruising through BBC News as I do daily and came across this little disturbing nugget of information:

Disney is remaking Yellow Submarine. In 3D.

Some remakes can turn out well. I mean, I thought Star Trek was fantastic, and that was Touchstone (I think?). But I really can't see this ending well.

Yellow Submarine was a (trippy and weird) cultural moment that doesn't seem to be easily replicated. And much less by Disney, the maker of all that is family-friendly entertainment. I feel like the drug-induced animation and storyline will be streamlined to make sense for a family, and I don't really think that The Beatles were going for that.

IMs From Last Night

"So a sophomore I've never met sent me a facebook message asking if I called his mother asking for money." - Zack Gidding

(Say Hi To Your Mother For Me!)

Test? Or Heart Attack Inducer?

So we usually have a test of the Emergency Alert System once or twice a year, and it never really got me before because all I saw was a text message and an e-mail. That was until I was within earshot of the speaker.

I know it said that "THIS IS A TEST," but it went off during our Personal Essay class today. Now normally, that class is in Smiddy, so we wouldn't hear it. But today we decided to take the class on a field trip to Muller Chapel's pond. Which is near where the horn is located. And when it went off, I nearly had a heart attack. I know it's a test, and I know it's supposed to alert you if a crazed gunman is on campus or whatever.

And DAMN does it work well.

Beatles' Progeny

Let us now discuss The Beatles, and some of their children.

This bit on The Tonight Show got me thinking about how very little attention is paid to some of The Beatles' kids (and how apparently good looking/looking like their dads they are. Dhani Harrison, my dear, where have you BEEN?!). Yes, Stella McCartney has her own fashion line. And Julian and Shawn Lennon look insanely like their dad. But other than that, do you really hear about George's kids? Or Ringo's? I don't even know if Ringo has kids, much less have seen them talked about on television or whatever.

Oh, and in case it's hard to tell, Dhani Harrison (George's son) is not only a musician, but one of the designers of The Beatles' Rock Band. He's the one playing the drums in the clip.

Ithaca, NY: Now AIER Approved!

Yeah, we're "10 Square Miles Surrounded By Reality." But according to the American Institute for Economic Research, Ithaca is now the #1 college town in the US.

Now, you can get to reading why we got picked and all that at the link to the Ithaca Journal that I have above. But I'm shocked! I would've thought that somewhere big like Boston, or somewhere insanely small like Morgantown (where WVU is; it's pretty much the whole town) would've been picked. But WRONG! It was us!

I guess I can see why, the Cornell campus is absolutely beautiful in that old, Ivy-League way. IC is slowly getting prettier with all the new buildings (no matter how long they take to be built, construction men out my window at 7 AM building the new fitness center I'll never see). And the town itself is pretty cute, with the Commons and all the gorges and trails and all that.

So...go Ithaca, I guess. Keep up the good work.

Life's Big Questions: Doctors And Magazines

General observation, but I feel like doctor's offices always have the best magazines. Let me explain.

When I was in Hammond today, they had like every issue of Newsweek and The New Yorker for the last two months. Brand new, shiny, not in terrible condition, fantastic.

When I was at Goldfeder's back home for the dentist visit, they had at least 3 Entertainment Weekly issues, which I can never seem to find - I have literally had weeks where I've asked myself (and passing Happy Harry's shoppers) who I had to screw to get an EW.

No, really, I totally said that out loud and an old lady gave me a dirty look. But I digress.

I can't be the only one who has noticed that the doctors offices always have great reading material. And logically, this is because you're stuck waiting in those offices for-freaking-EVER. I also can't be the only one who has taken magazines from doctors' offices, whether unintentionally or otherwise.

So Ryan? Maybe you should put Cake in Hammond. Seriously! It's a captive audience!

This Blog is Full of Spices

I have a confession to make: I have this weird fascination with Alan Rickman. Specifically, his voice.

Allie, KellyPaul and I have had long discussions about this - which usually end in a pretty terrible imitation of him that I do - and really, it's an issue. If Alan Rickman came through a drive through, would you answer the speaker? Especially if his voice came through there?

Like, if you heard Snape asking for a large fry and a Coke?

I wouldn't know if he was trying to seduce me or kill me with that drawl. Enjoyable either way, for sure, but nerve wracking.

The Most Memorable TV Musical Moments Ever

The Most Memorable TV Musical Moments Ever

Shared via AddThis
Mmmm...because it's true. Especially the Eli Stone, Mad Men, and How I Met Your Mother entries.

So Much for Wireless. Thanks IC.

Let me make this clear. I'm not thrilled with the internet here. I never am. So when I heard we were supposed to get the hookup with campus-wide wireless, I was psyched. I was even more excited when the tech guys came into our apartment and tried to hook us up.

I was not so excited when the wireless didn't work. And I'm not about to pay for fast internet when there's the possibility of wireless actually working this year on campus.

Oy.

Project Runway and Scrabble

So after going to the doctor yesterday morning and picking up some vitamins for school (you would never believe how expensive they are, who knew?), the family and I hit Hibachi for some yummy dinner and then I headed over to Laura's for the Project Runway premiere.

Much to her delight (and my disappointment, I was gunning for Korto), Danny V won the All Star challenge, and the night was set for a Tim Gunn overhaul. The premiere was fun, and I did like the winner (hated the guest judge, though, Lindsay Lohan has a powerful strain of bitch face), but really, the highlight of the night was Scrabble.

That's right. Scrabble with Brandon, Laura, and Rachel until about 2 AM. It got to the point where Rachel and I just had shit vowels. I got second place, but more importantly, I didn't quit halfway through like I usually do with Scrabble. I get fed up with the game pretty quick, oddly enough.

I Gotta Feeling That This Kid Will Be A Star

I've been the girl who takes weird pictures on the Apple Store Photobooth before. Really, who doesn't? But this kid was in the Manhattan Apple Store and decided to videotape himself lipsynching to the Black Eyed Peas "I Gotta Feeling" and then put it on YouTube.
Which...it's just kind of funny and cute.

Three Reasons Why I Miss My High School

If you follow me on Twitter (which you should), you may have heard me mention that I couldn't find my quote pages from high school. Essentially, they were mini-webpages that I made through Tripod to keep all my quotes I gathered in my notebook(s) through sophomore, junior, and senior years.

And I thought I lost them forever. Until I downloaded the latest Internet Explorer and lo and behold, found that I had favorited the sites on my home PC. I had no such luck with the Mac.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but FAIL little laptop! I almost Cash for Clunker'd the desktop and BAM! it finds something useful!

So here they are. Sophomore, Junior, and Senior years of high school. Because I'm feeling nostalgic, and I know that they're probably far more entertaining than anything I'll say on this blog. So enjoy my friends from years past and find out why I love them so much/took so many pictures of them.

Snakes On A Cane

Usually, viral marketing works best for stupid movies and such. More like cult subjects. But when I was flipping channels last night and landed on FOX, this website popped up called "Snakes on a Cane."

Turns out it's just a website with a countdown to the premiere of House. Which...

...good job, marketing. Viral might be the way to go.

And You Thought I Was Bad

Two brothers. Five minutes. One hundred movies spoiled.

100 Movie Spoilers in 5 Minutes

I must meet these men.

Hey Ithacappella: Here's An Idea!

Of all the songs I would like them to sing, it would be this one that the Friars wrote. Because it's true. And it's funny because it's true.

I Hate My Bookmarks

So for the last 3 weeks when I go to bookmark stuff, this same link and picture comes up.

Not that it's not funny, but really, when I want to favorite something, I want it to stick. Like the House ads, or the Joe Biden bobblehead that I found for far too much money (but seriously, I want one. Belated birthday gift, people?).

Best Gossip Ever

I've always wondered what profession had the best gossip. Whether it was construction men talking about what they did last night, lawyers talking about how hungover they were, et cetera.

It's teachers.

They know everyone's business, all the student criminals, all the people who are dating in their schools and who doesn't work and who does. Which makes me think two things:
1) They're awesome for your sleaze factor.
2) I never want to be a teacher.

For example, they were talking about how a fellow teacher accidentally showed porn to their Spanish class. And how she didn't know that was in it, because she got it from the library. And how the kids were screaming like crazy. And how all the teachers were laughing/shocked/scarred when they showed it around.

And how it wasn't an accident.

Is This Real Life?

No, no it is not. It is cartoon life.

So after that last post about Coldplay becoming Simpsonized in September, it got me thinking. What would I look like as a character from several popular television shows? So after some snooping around on the internet, I found out.

Let's start out with The Simpsons, with me being the one in the tight pink shirt as Homer stares at my yellow knockers in the bar. This looks nothing like me, obviously. The girl has way more skin tone than me (although I'm gaining ground after the Outer Banks trip). She does have a decent figure, which is nice. But her shoes are fugly, her hair is all wrong and the eyebrow-less thing isn't right at all.

I got a little closer to what I look like with the South Park avatar creator. The hair was closer to what it looks like (especially when it's humid out and it goes to shit), and it had eyebrows (although not in black like mine are, compared to my brown hair. Mine are a remnant of a dark childhood head of hair, and stubbornly refuse to change hue no matter what hair dye I put in them as I dye the rest of my head). Regardless, the necklace, the hair, and the shirtdress were closer to what I likened myself to as a cartoon.

Plus, South Park totally gives me license to curse as much as I want. Which...is good (I'm a lady on the inside, I swear).

Hands down, my favorite was the "Mad Men Yourself!" feature on the Mad Men site over at AMC. It lets you pick whether you're a "Suit" or a "Skirt," and then you go from there. Clearly, this is what I might look like a few decades ago (or a few decades from now, with the hair), but I like it. This was the first cartoon maker that even when you pick yourself a less skinny model for your bod, it still looked sexy, especially with the clothes they give you. And that's a plus for me, because I'm not a stick. With the hair, lipstick and eyebrows? Not going to lie, it kind of looks like what I was going for at senior prom.

Plus, it puts me in the world of one of my favorite shows in the world.

Now if they only did this for House? I'd be totally sold.

And They Were All Yellow

One more reason why I love Coldplay? They're willing to go yellow. In more ways than one.

According to BBC Entertainment (which is pretty trustworthy, at least more than E! Online and about on par with EW, because that's kind of their job to know), my favorite band will be made Simpsons in a September episode. The article reports:

The band will reportedly be hired by Homer to play a private concert for him and
Bart after he wins the lottery.

"When Bart goes to the bathroom, Coldplay
has to stop," executive producer Al Green told US website Entertainment Weekly.

See, they're talented and have a great sense of humor. As if Chris Martin singing at the end of Bruno wasn't enough indication.

The Verdict

No, not on Sotomayor, that's later today or tomorrow. I finally finished those books I was talking about reading this summer, and I thought I'd share the results. Some are just reposts from last time, so bear with me. And I didn't necessarily read them in this order.

1) "The Reader," by Bernard Schlinck
This one I already read, and I thought it was fabulous. Coincidentally, this is also an Oprah's Book Club pick, but that's not why I read/picked it. A pretty quick, emotional read that I pretty much devoured in 3 days (and one very long wait at the doctor's office). I saw the movie first, but I still cried during the book. Both are fully worth it, if you get the chance.

That said, if you're not a fan of nudity, stick to the book. I was kind of put off by how much Kate Winslet was naked in the movie. I'm not offended by nudity in movies, but with Kate Winslet, I was just kind of over it.

Status: Finished; just as good as, if not better than, the movie. Better in that Kate Winslet isn't naked for half of it, worse in that Ralph Fiennes was awesome as Peter.


2) "A Thousand Splendid Suns," by Khaled Hosseini
I'm about 100 plus pages in, and I gotta tell you, this one is depressing. Not that "The Kite Runner" wasn't, it's just that I thought "The Kite Runner" was better. This book is more expected, very similar in style.

It kind of makes you feel really happy that you don't live in Afghanistan, then or now. No offense, I'm sure there are great parts of the country, but the news and this book never seem to find them. And the burqa isn't really flattering on me.

Status: Finished; insanely depressing, but good ending.

3) "Juiced," by Jose Canseco
This one wasn't completely voluntary on my part. I had to read and review it for my Sports Journalism class with a teacher who I won't name, because he has Google Alerts on his name (which made a heaping slice of awkward on the last blog). I did get to pick a book, but it had to be sports related.

And I gotta tell you, I really liked this. Canseco was kind of arrogant and kind of an asshole, but at least he was honest, and I appreciate that. It's all about drugs and sex, and it makes for a great beach read even for the least of sports fans.

Status: Finished; good for a guy's beach read.


4) "The Unbearable Lightness of Being," by Milan Kundera
So far, not bad. It's kind of hard to follow, because it's very cerebral in the "lightness" and "heaviness" bits, and it's written in anecdotes rather than chronologically. Again, a lot of sex in this book, but it's really interesting and it does give a pretty decent history lesson on Prague Spring.

And again, if you're not a fan of nudity, don't see the movie that goes with it. It's a great movie, but I watched it in the library and people walked by me like I was watching porn.

Status: Finished; the movie was way better. It had Daniel "Day-TASTY!" Day-Lewis in a love triangle with Lena Olin and Juliette Binoche, and it was told in order.


5) "Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea" by Chelsesa Handler
Off a suggestion from Morgan and after watching Chelsea Lately, I decided to check out book of essays about her life. I'm about 5 pages in and think it's a riot. So if you want a funny, girlie beach read, I suggest this one.

I actually wanted to read "My Horizontal Life" first, but the Hockessin Library already check it out and I'm like 7th on the waiting list for it. So by the time I get it, I'll be back at school.

Status: Finished; it's an absolute riot. Happily on the waiting list for "My Horizontal Life."

6) "The Gun Seller," by Hugh Laurie
I don't really need to explain this pick and why I decided to read it. As it turns out, he's a fantastic writer. I started the book last summer and read half of it in one day at Tower Road Beach. And then I had to work like crazy and forgot everything that happened in the book.

I do remember it was funny, though. So I'm rereading it so I can remember what happened. And it's last on my list.

Status: Finished; it was hard to follow and weird and funny and I loved it. My mom (just to show you how cool she is) is now reading it and is also having a good time with it. I actually read this one last after reading #7.


7) "Kitchen Confidential" by Anthony Bourdain.
Because the television show based on it (featuring a post-Alias but pre-Hangover Bradley Cooper) was absolutely hilarious.

Status: Finished; this is also a quality beach read because it reads sort of like a day-in-the-life and a bunch of kitchen anecdotes rather than a contained and chronological story. It's a format that did not work out for some books (see "The Unbearable Lightness of Being" for that one) but works out for this one. It's why Anthony Bourdain became a chef, and a pretty good one at that. Plus, it's irreverant, shocking, irresponsible, borderline criminal and really very funny, which makes it perfect for chilling under the umbrella after 3 days of sunburn.

Plus, I'm really excited about Top Chef coming back and the possibility of him either guest judging a challenge (which he's done before) or blogging it on Bravo (which he's also done before).

Now Slightly Less Pale

Back from the beach and a year older, I'm finally back to the blog. Not that I had no internet in NC, I did, but I didn't have time/feel like blogging when I had the chance to tan (burn) on the beach and swim with the fish (sharks) and hang out with my family (get yelled at while driving).

Pictures soon to come, up on Facebook when I get a chance.

Upgrade!

Squee!

So for my birthday, I asked for a new digital camera. My old one is incredibly well loved, and it showed (4 divets in the screen, it clicks when you squeeze it too tight, it takes about 4 tries to actually take a picture, generally my brain damaged baby). The issue was, the camera was really expensive everywhere we looked, around 200 plus on the internet.

Apparently, Mom & Dad found one that was cheaper than that somewhere and I came downstairs yesterday before work to discover a pristine mint green Canon Powershot on the table.

I was grinning from ear to ear and literally squealed when I hugged everyone thank you. My Dad was even excited about it. Not only did it mean that my pictures would be better in quality (this model came out later than mine, so the image stabilization is better, it works in the dark better, and it has more megapixels for image quality) and comes with all the stuff needed for the camera (connecter chords, a charger, a piddly memory chip, but I have a better one, so no biggie), but it means that Dad gets my old one has he's been hoping to do.

So really. Upgrades for all.

Two Students = Time For Pandora

Here at Conrad Schools of Science High School Summer School, we don't allow students to listen to headphones. It's a distraction, and it's against the rules.

That said, since there are only two students in the second class today (Mark and Shatir, who taught us how to "swag" and how to rap yesterday when the server was down), we allowed it. Which means I can Pandora the second half away.

Niiiiiiiiiice.

Even The Middle Eastern Media Hates the PA

Appparently the PA isn't a fan of Al Jazeera either.

The satellite news channel was shut down by the Palestinian Authority because the broadcasts were too "unbalanced" against their party. I'm not going to recap the whole incident, rather I'm sending you over to the BBC for the facts.

I will say this though: it's a total shame and offensive against the free press. Al Jazeera is trying to provide a service of non-state sanctioned media (well, sort of, the company is funded by the Emir of Qatar, but it operates out of government oversight from Doha, London, Kuala Lumpur, and Washington DC). And for a station to be shut down because it's saying something you don't like is sort of ridiculous. I can't stand FOX News, but I wouldn't shut the channel down.

Mad About This Show

Oh my GOODNESS I want this to start up already. I'm hoping the show is as good as the poster.
And I'm pretty sure it will be, considering last season's finale.

Yes, But Do They Serve Peanuts?

I kid you not, there is now a pets-only exclusive airline. It's called Pet Airways, and I'm insanely amused.

The creators of the airline looked to their own dog, Zoe, for inspiration. Apparently, the little Jack Russell Terrier was too precious for them to not think of when they went on vacation, per their website "Our Story" section.

"...there's one thing Zoe is certainly not, and that's cargo. As we're fond of telling our neighbor Janet, her boxer Samson isn't Samsonite, and she agreed. In fact, we met lots of neighbors, friends and even complete strangers who felt exactly the same way.

So we got to thinking. Maybe Zoe was trying to tell us something. Maybe there was a travel solution that would suit her perfectly, and everyone else out there too. Instead of trying to convince the human airlines to treat pets better, why not start up an airline just for pets? And Pet Airways was born."

See, I have loved all my pets (except maybe Beau), whether they're adorable huge flat coat retrievers, goldfish, or ZZ the Beta.

But this is taking it a little far. I understand wanting to have your dog with you on vacation, especially when you see other people walking their dogs down the beach or playing fetch with a frisbee. But I draw the line at putting them on a plane. I understand road tripping it with Fido in the backseat, but if there's an overhead compartment or security check involved, I think it's gotten a little ridiculous. So shame on you, Pet Airways, for upping the yuppie factor on vacation.

Supermassive Awards Show

I'm both excited by and fearful of the upcoming MTV VMAs.

I'm excited because my ratnest-haired love Russell Brand is once again hosting the awards (hopefully with better results than last year's "retarded cowboy fella" incident). I'm even more excited because British band Muse is performing for the first time.

I'm saddened, however, by the fact that Muse is probably only playing because they were recognized from Twilight and the baseball game scene when the kick-ass "Supermassive Black Hole" was playing in the background.

I guess I have to take what I can get and just enjoy the fact that they're performing. And that there might be more chastity ring jabs at the JoBros now that Kevin is getting married.

I Want My 1.5 Hours Back

I would also love to douse my head in lighter fluid to rid my brain of the atrocious movie that was Bruno. Don't spend your money, it's not as funny as Borat and way more gratuitous. Hoping that Harry Potter is better to rid my memory of the Voldemort of summer movies.

Sometimes, Jesus Is Not the Answer

It sort of pains me to make this entry. But it needed to be done, and I'm sure that the Lord will understand.

I was grading some of the submissions today when one caught my eye. The student who will remain nameless (because I can't remember who it was) put down the following answers for unrelated questions:

"Jesus."

"HI JESUS."

"Jeesssssssuuuusssssss."

"Jeessssssssuuuusssssss brown bag of Jeesssuuuusss."

I hate to tell people, because I as a Catholic have been taught from a young age that Jesus will always be the answer. And yeah, he comes in handy in tough situations. But on standardized tests? Jesus is not always the answer. Sorry, God.

Kick Out The Jams - For A Cause

I love when seemingly silly things raise money for a cause. If someone offered me the Polar Bear Plunge? I'd probably do it. Relay For Life? Been there, done that twice. Breaking world records? Sure.

Right here is Birmingham, England, which right now has 600 drummers are trying to break the world record for drummers drumming the same rhythm.

Now normally I would find this kind of fun, but kind of pointless. Turns out it's for a cause: they've already raised about $32,000 for charity.

Rock on.

Alex's Infinite Playlist

Well, not really infinite, I think it goes for about 3 plus hours before running out. And it's not entirely mine, becuase Kristyne picked out a lot of the songs on there.

That said, I did over rule a few choices, because either I didn't have them or I didn't think the general populous of my car would like them.

(Good choices, though, Kristyne!)

I will post the full list of what I put on the 80-song list later today when I have my iTunes open in front of me. Hopefully after I go see Bruno.

The Midnight Train To GM

Don't get me wrong, I usually love trains and mass transit. I like watching them on bridges, I like being on them, they're generally pretty fun.

But when you're running late from work, the last thing you need is the Newport Gap Pike train to cross your path. And today, for the first time, it did.

Today as I was pulling through the intersection of Newport Gap Pike and Kirkwood Highway I was almost on time. Then I noticed that the train was there, and that a ton of people were turning around. Fair enough, I understand. I figured it would pass quickly.

It didn't, I was there for 20 minutes before I figured out an alternate route. I called the main office of Conrad repeatedly, and none of the calls were answered. It kept coming up with Andy Vincent's soothing voice directing me to dial the extention of my party, which...I didn't know.

I tried to go down 141 as well, thinking "Ha ha! I win!" until I realized when I got there that all routes to Conrad that I knew of were blocked by the same train. Now I realize the GM plant needs parts/needs parts shipped out to other places. That said? Not during rush hour on a busy road or 3!

The 30% Dance

You know I work at Kohl's.

What few of you know is that I rarely get good coupons despite my employment. So imagine my surprise today when I opened my mail to find a 30% coupon in the envelope. And my even bigger surprise when Dad also got a 30% coupon. And the even bigger (biggerer?) surprise that Mom didn't get one at all. So naturally Dad and I decided to do the right thing.

We decided to taunt Mom and booty dance at her with our coupons while she was on the phone.

She was not pleased.